It's been awhile...

As I write this, I know I am avoiding something bigger than me. Something that I can't handle. My mind is racing on how much harder it will be if I continue to ignore the state of my soul. I realize it won't be easier to avoid it...I won't even reap the temporary benefits of pretending everything is okay. So, I'll pray. I'll confess that I am weak and can do nothing without the Lord. Will I feel better? Maybe. But it's not really about me. I'm sick of being the one standing in the way of the Lord using me. He CHOSE me. He'll save me. He has before. He will again. How is He so good?